Editorials Reviews Previews Essays Worth Playing

Essays

Essays 27 November 2019, 15:25

author: Julia Dragovic

Seven Types of Customers that Still Frequent Internet Cafes in 2019

Internet cafes are, surprisingly, still alive and well, and they attract very specific customers. I know that because I work in one of them.

Table of Contents

The Erotomaniac

See what he's doing? In public! - Seven Types of Customers that Still Frequent Internet Cafes in 2019 - dokument - 2019-11-28
See what he's doing? In public!

The erotomaniac is a dying breed. They just don't make people like him anymore. This category, thus, is mostly of historical value. There's still potential, however, because if you chop wood, chips will fly, and where's Internet, there's adult content.

Now let me tell you a story. I was once visited at work by one of my editorial colleagues. I won't tell you which one. Okay, I will. It was Matthias. It turned out he'd been in that place like a million years ago (while he was still a student). We were chatting about stuff, when he noticed one of the customers watching porn. Just like that.

I wasn't surprised, because I'd heard similar stories too (even worse – please, use your imagination, you'll likely be right). Within a few days it turned out that Mat wasn't the only person from Gamepressure to have associated my workplace with such practices (I am proud). Everyone who has studied in this city (for the sake of decency I will not mention the name), was most likely here at least once. What I'm trying to say is that this place "enjoys" the fame of erotomaniacs' din.

The Erotomaniac invariably opts for a secluded spot. Upon only hearing footsteps, he turns around nervously, and switches the browser tab to a window with some generic news site. As we know, a million years ago, he would have just kept watching, unabashed. The Erotomaniac is inconspicuous. Like chanterelles among yellow leaves (hello, my fellow mycologists!) You just need to stumble upon one randomly. And even if you do, chances are you won't notice. The modern Erotomaniac only browses escort agencies' ads and downloads horny photos. Thousands. Truly. Like everyone on this list – he's a regular. He comes in the evening, tired after work, sits down and takes it away. Always pays up, inconspicuous bastard. And he leaves behind entire folders, filled with his downloads.

THE STRONGHOLD

Overall, considering how many people of different nationalities and identities comes here, I'm almost surprised I've never had an incident. Everyone here is tolerant of each other. They sometimes make connections, sometimes even help each other.

Julia Dragovic

Julia Dragovic

She studied philosophy and philology and honed her writing skills by producing hundreds of assignments. She has been a journalist at Gamepressure since 2019, first writing in the newsroom, then becoming a columnist and reviewer, and eventually, a full-time editor of our game guides. She has been playing games for as long as she can remember – everything except shooters and RTSs. An ailurophile, fan of The Sims and concrete. When she's not clearing maps of collectibles or playing simulators of everything, economic strategies, RPGs (including table-top) or romantic indie games, Julia explores cities in different countries with her camera, searching for brutalist architecture and post-communist relics.

more

See/Add Comments